Confusion, Loss & Depressed...

within these 2 days, i already felt so pressurised. been crying these 2 days & i duno wat went wrong. am i the one who started all these or wat? i felt so useless & upset.

ytd had the installation of the wireless network done. i was happy coz i get to use my laptop in the future, dun have to keep sharing the pc with my brother. after everything, i left to meet my bf. then my brother called & said he can't surf the web. kept calling until i'm very pissed off. he even hung up my phone coz he was annoyed! then i told my bf i had to go bk home 2 settle it. intending to stay over at his place but in the end, disappointed him. before going bk home, i had a quarrel with him again. at that time, i did thought of ending our relationship coz i really very tired of the things he did. nothing seem to change him from being better. back home, a big quarrel with my brother becoz of the access to net. y can't my brother call & ask the starhub? y i have to do everything myself? i was very upset at the moment.

today again, a quarrel with my cousin & brother because of the access of network. i was damn fucking angry with them! when the installation took place, i make sure tat their pc are able to access to the network before having my laptop done. & now becoz, they can't surf the web, they pushed the blame onto me. my cousin can't surf certain websites becoz starhub network actually activate the safesurf service, which means undesirable websites will not be accessed. so tat means she is surfing those undesirable & unauthorised websites! is tat my fault too for not letting her to surf those webby?

during my family conflict, he msg me, adding in more agony & sadness into my feelings. i was already very depressed & yet he... he told me whether we should split up for the time being since we started to drift apart recently. i really duno how to ans him, juz told him i'm not in a moody to think of all these yet. i need 2 cool down at the moment now.

recently faced stress from my studies, problems from my workplace, family conflict & pressure from our relationship. i felt very depressed now. my eyes are swollen, my mind is loaded with alot things to think of & my heart really sank to the lowest point at this very moment. duno wat to do, all i know is i am suffuocated by all these happenings recently. i need a break now...